Man of snow
by emsummer
Summary: A little GrissomSara angsty fic, slight spoilers up to the episode Meet Market.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my ideas and my very stubborn muse. Slight reference to spoilers up to episode 14th or this season, "Meet Market."

This was written for the newest challenge at Live Journal's "gsrdrabbles" . The prompt was **snow **and this little ficlet came out of nowhere at 3 am and wouldn't let go until I acknowledged it. This morning, I woke up to snow and it inspired my muse even further. **Aflaminghalo** offered her great Beta services, merci beaucoup! Hopefully, now that I got this out of the way, I can concentrate on fics of the smutty kind.

Today was the kind of day that Christmas carols and winter postcards are made of. Big intricate snowflakes that you could catch on your tongue were falling and quickly covering the grass that only yesterday was green and ready to be mowed.

Carefully, Grissom rolled the third ball that was needed in order to build the promised snowman. Two mitten clad hands helped him lift the snowball on top of the other two bigger ones and he took a step back to admire their handy work.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I think it looks pretty good."

Wide brown eyes looked up at him, blinking away the snowflakes that had gathered on her long lashes. "Daddy, it's the best snowman ever! It's bigger than the one Madison made with her mom." Her gap toothed smile was only one of many features she had inherited from Sara.

"Speaking of moms, where's your mother?"

As if on queue, Sara came out of the house carrying all the snowman essentials: a carrot for the nose, large buttons for the eyes, some smaller ones for the teeth and mismatched hat and scarf.

"Wow, great job you guys!" She winked at Gil before kneeling next to their daughter "Sweetie, you want to help me dress him up?"

Grissom stared adoringly as the two women in his life worked on making Frosty more presentable. He watched as Sara lifted her giggling mini-me so she could create the perfect face for the "best snowman ever."

He had never felt so content, but something just didn't feel right…

He looked around as the wind suddenly picked up and the snowfall took on a life of its own; he just couldn't quite shake the nagging feeling that something really was wrong.

Grissom cautiously opened his eyes; and as he took in his surroundings, he felt an instant sense of loss. Reality hit him hard as he reached to the left side of the bed only to find it cold and empty; he wasn't at home and Sara wasn't there with him.

He had been requested to teach a seminar and had left her days ago, regrettably in less than stellar terms. Though he had sent her a genuine, heartfelt apology along with an invitation to join him for the remainder of his stay, he hadn't heard from Sara since he'd last called her.

Putting his pride aside, he dialed her number urgently; not caring that he might wake her up and that a groggy Sara might not be the most willing to hear him.

So when she answered straight away, it took him off guard.

"What took you so long?"

"I didn't realize you were expecting my call…" Grissom paused, trying not to let his emotions get the better of him. "I was actually waiting for yours."

"I know you were. But I also knew that if you hadn't heard from me by the third day, you would call. You're very predictable Grissom. Most of the time anyway..." She whispered her last words almost as an afterthought.

"So you deliberately didn't call me? Very mature Ms. Sidle." Shit, he hadn't meant for it to come out like that.

"Don't Ms. Sidle me Griss! You're the one that deliberately didn't include me in your decision to run away for a goddamn month! I rented out my apartment because _you _said the townhouse was _our_ home, for the first time in forever you actually made me believe that I _had_ a home, and suddenly it's –Oh, by the way Sara, did I mention I'm going across the country for a while and you're not invited.

And I did get your package Grissom but I don't need some forced apologies and pity plane tickets."

He deserved what was coming at him, Grissom knew this much. But he had underestimated the magnitude of her anger, however justified it was. He just wanted to go back to sleep, back to the land of giant snowflakes and domestic bliss.

He let the silence fill the tension until he heard her raspy breath calm down.

"Sara, honey, I wasn't calling to fight. I was wrong and you have every right to be mad at me. But I meant every word in that letter and I can only hope that in time you'll come to believe it."

He waited for a reply that didn't come.

"I had the most amazing dream earlier, and call me foolish but there's no doubt in my mind that it was a sign that our love is strong enough to survive this, and that in time you'll forgive me…"

He waited for the faintest of signs that she was still listening to continue, but there were none. "Well…I guess I should let you go, get some rest…"

"What was it about?"

"What was what about?"

"The dream, Grissom, what did you dream of?"

Of us. Of happiness. Of you being the mother of my child.

"Of snow… I dreamed of snow." He said, before hanging up on a very confused Sara.


	2. Chapter 2

The line went dead before Sara could reply. He dreamed of snow, what the hell did that have to do with their relationship? She never pretended to fully understand Grissom but this was getting ridiculous.

Determined to get some peace of mind and, hopefully, some well deserved sleep, she dialed Grissom's number.

She was just about to change her mind and hang up when he picked up, "You're calling me? Impressive!" He seemed to have gone from sad to angry in the time it took her to call him back.

"Lose the tone, Grissom, you hung up on me."

"Fair enough, but you stopped listening long before then." There was a slight pause and she heard him let out a sigh as if he were releasing his anger and he continued on a softer tone, "I really want us to fix whatever this is, Sara, but you have to meet me somewhere in the middle."

He sounded defeated and for the first time since he left, she wanted to hold him and forget the whole thing. It just wasn't that simple.

"What it is about the snow that reminds you of us?" She asked softly.

"What?"

"Your dream Grissom, you said something about snow and us not being hopeless. Make me believe that you're right."

Did he really want to go there? He vividly remembered the taste of the snowflakes on his tongue and the features on that familiar little face. How could he long for something that wasn't real?

"It was a beautiful snowy day, and we were building a snowman."

She waited for him to continue, but he didn't.

"Ooookay, and then what?"

"And then… nothing… Sara, it was just a dream, never mind." When did they become this couple who couldn't communicate?

"Figures. Goodnight Grissom.-"

"Sara, wait!" He took a deep breath before he made the plunge "it wasn't just the two of us…there was this little girl." The last word got lost in a mumble.

"A little what?"

"A little girl, honey. I had a dream that we had a daughter. And Sara we were so happy. I just know that we can be happy." He sounded sincere.

For a moment all he heard was a dead silence and he thought they'd got cut off, but then he heard it; the unmistakable sound of Sara crying.

"Sara, the last thing I want to do is upset you. It was just a dream, it didn't mean anything." Oh God, when did it get so complicated? Why did he have to make everything complicated?

She was quiet for a while; he heard the quaver in her voice when she finally spoke. "So you don't think your subconscious is telling you that you'd like to be a dad?"

"I don't know Sara. Maybe, but honey we don't have to talk about this right now. We should both get some sleep." He looked out of his hotel's window just in time to see the day long rain had turned into snow.

"I think we should talk about this now, Griss. My period is late." She drew a calming breath, "Two months late to be exact." She rubbed her stomach, allowing herself for the first time to imagine it round and heavy with Grissom's child.

She could hear the hurt in his voice,

"You should have told me Sara. You know I wouldn't have left you alone, you really think I'm that insensitive?"

"I don't know what to think."

"Listen, sweetheart, I'll pack my bags first thing in the morning, I'll tell them it's a family emergency and we'll get you an appointment with an obstetrician. Let's not jump to conclusions just yet okay? Whatever the outcome is Sara, we'll deal with it. If you are pregnant, you'll make me the luckiest man in the world. If you aren't, then it will at least get us to talk about something we definitely should have discussed by now. The way I see it, whatever happens, it will be positive-"

"It is positive." She blinked the tears away; she definitely had been more emotional lately.

"Exactly-"

" No, Grissom, I mean I I am /I pregnant. I already had the appointment; I couldn't wait for you to come back. I'm sorry."

She didn't know whether to cry or laugh, when he finally replied " I love you", so she did both.


End file.
